SEL 2B: Self-management; Integrity


(11-12) Demonstrate knowledge of the importance of honesty and integrity and act as such; evaluates correlation between words and actions.

Forum Post: Segment 4 Ethical Approaches


(K-5) SEL 3D: Social Awareness; Cues Demonstrate the importance of honesty in friendships and engage in play with others in appropriate ways

Elementary Strategies:

We are liars! Bad news, right? Maybe.

We are designed to self-protect and protect others sometimes at the expense of the truth. From birth to death we are taught that lying is wrong and you shouldn't do it. You will lose trust! You will lose privileges! Then the tiny voice in your head says "but what if I don't get caught..." and the cycle continues.

It is a conflict of interest to be hardwired to lie but live in a society that finds the practice to be morally defunct. So why are we so against it and why do we do it?

Out of a need for connection with others. The kids you work with will do it too.

Here are some approaches when you know they are lying:

1. Ask them three times. It seems weird, but 90% of the time if they are lying they will tell you on the third ask.

2. Do not call them out in front of others. Pull the student aside and simply ask why they are lying. When they feel safe they will tell the truth, especially if you are non-threatening.

3. Don't belittle or demean them. It can be frustrating, but the lie they are telling is a means to an end. Figure out instead what it is they are in need of, and help them navigate another way to achieve it.

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